I Hate Peter Forsberg

I know, I know...this is the third consecutive post about the NHL on The Wheelhouse. Bare with us here...unlike the rest of the country, we enjoy hockey at The Wheelhouse.

There used to be a time like eight years ago that I was a fan of the Colorado Avalanche. Of course my main team was always the Penguins, but I enjoyed watching the Aves play with Joe Sakic, Patrick Roy and Peter Forsberg. They were loaded and exciting to watch. When the USA flamed out in the Winter Olympics...I always found myself pulling for Forsberg, Mats Sundin and Sweden (don't ask why...it goes back to the Nintendo game "Ice Hockey").

Well now I'm really tired of him. After sitting out the entire season as a free agent due to an "injury," Forsberg signed this week with Colorado...with about one month left in the season. How many times has he done this? Who does he think he is? I'm tired of hearing about his injury and that's the reason why he hasn't played an entire regular season in forever. It's garbage...the guy wants to skip the trials of the season and show up on a playoff team to attempt to get another Cup. All he does is take the year off, hang out in Sweden and play hockey with his buddies. Last year Nashville acquired the forward for their playoff push, and it didn't work out too well for the Predators as they were bounced from the postseason in the first round.

And now the Aves have picked him up for a playoff run. Couple of problems with that. First, Forsberg's apparently not ready to play yet. The PR machine says it's his "nagging foot injury." I say it's because he hasn't played competitive hockey in over a year and is out of shape, but whatever Colorado, pay him millions to sit the bench. The second problem with this signing is the Aves are currently two points out of the playoff race. So they go out and acquire a guy who only wants to play for a playoff team and there's no timetable for his return? Nice pickup Colorado.

Then again they also traded for defenseman Adam Foote bringing him back to the team that he won two Cups with as well. Oh I see what the Aves are trying to do bringing back players from their past. Where's Patrick Roy?

Marian Hossa

The Pittsburgh Penguins made the big headline today during crunch time of the NHL trading deadline by shipping forwards Colby Armstrong, Erik Christensen, prospect Angelo Esposito and a first-round draft pick to Atlanta for Marian Hossa and Pascal Dupuis. I probably looked like a giddy school girl when I first heard the news...the Pens are really going for it all! When I saw who the Pens had given up for him, I was disappointed to see Colby and Christensen go, but it had to be done to acquire Hossa. After talking with some of my fellow Penguins fans and random co-workers, the general consensus was the Pens gave up too much for Hossa. I don't understand where that's coming from. Yes, in basic numbers of the deal, we gave up more pieces (4 to 2) but the talent in return makes the Pens offense absolutely scary and overall a better team.

Hossa is a legit goal scorer in the NHL. He was the biggest name on the trading block this year and plenty of teams were vying for his services. Through 60 games this season, Hossa has 26 goals, 30 assists after scoring 43 goals, 57 assists for 100 points last year, good for sixth in NHL scoring. He's also scored 30 or more goals in the past six seasons. And the Pens are putting him on the same team with Crosby (who was leading the NHL in scoring before his injury) and Malkin (who is currently leading the NHL in scoring after tonight). Hossa's a premier scorer and All-Star so you know what you're getting.

Now let's talk about what the Pens gave up for Hossa. The Pens dealt two fan favorites away in Armstrong and Christensen, but let's not go overboard here on them. Armstrong is in his third year and has declined since his rookie year when he scored 16 goals in 47 games. Last year in a full 80 games, he only scored 12 and through this year he only has nine goals and just 24 points. And his numbers are inflated (as anybody's would be) playing on a line with Crosby. Army's a third liner that will score about 35 points a season...you can find those guys anywhere. Christensen is another forward in his third year and he showed signs of a prospect last season with 18 goals in 61 games...but this year he has only 20 points through 49 games. Like Armstrong, Christensen is a third liner on most teams in the NHL. Look, the Penguins were not going to win the Stanley Cup with Army and Christensen...but they sure can win it with Hossa, Crosby and Malkin. Let's also not forget that the Pens did receive another player in this deal and Dupuis has 10 goals on the season (more than both former Penguins traded) and he's a bruising forward who can help Laraque give the Pens a little more punch.

But wait, the Penguins also dealt a future first-round pick and a prospect to the Thrashers. Trading an NHL draft pick is not that big of deal. Unless you have the top three picks, you probably aren't getting a given superstar like a Crosby or Ovechkin and plenty of stars in the NHL are found in the later rounds (Zetterberg, Hasek, Datsyuk, Alfredsson). There's about a two percent chance that draft pick would pan out to be anything productive for Pittsburgh. Plus the Pens already have four solid number one picks on their team, there's no room for another one and since the Pens won't be drafting high anyway next year...what's the point? Originally, Atlanta wanted Jordan Staal in exchange for Hossa and that would have been a disaster to lose Staal. But the Pens didn't give in to that and worked out a deal where they still got Hossa and kept Staal. If draft picks had to go, so be it.

The key to this deal is if Hossa will be a "rented" player for the rest of this year and then leave as a free agent next season. I really don't think Ray Shero made this deal to rent Hossa for two months and then let him go. I believe the Pens will do everything they can to sign him for a 2-3 year deal after the season and stay under the cap. And if Hossa helps Crosby, Malkin and the boys bring the Stanley Cup back to Pittsburgh this summer then the deal was worth it all the way whether Hossa stays or not.

Obviously the Stanley Cup is not guaranteed because of this trade, and there are plenty of other things the Pens need to fall into place to have a chance...like their defense showing up, Fleury and Crosby getting healthy and a little bit of luck along the way. But you have to be willing to take risks and put your team in a position to be lethal when you decide that you're going for it. Former Pens GM Craig Patrick did it back in 1991 when he dealt three players to Hartford for Ron Francis and Ulf Samuelsson. Two Stanley Cups later, I think that worked out well for Pittsburgh. Let's Go Pens!

Not Easterns Motors, But Still Funny

I love car dealership commercials starring local sports celebrities.

The Academy Awards

I've always been a fan of the Oscars. And why not? I'm a movie kind of guy. I watch tons of movies and try to keep up with the latest top flicks of the year. So every year I get excited to see the Hollywood contingent dressed to the nines, throwing a massive awards show honoring the best movies (according to The Academy). I look forward to the ridiculous scene that is the Oscars, that is, seeing overpaid actors living in paradise all blow smoke up each other's asses for four hours and give over-the-top acceptance speeches. Oh yes, Sunday was the 80th annual Academy Awards.

So last night I'm on my couch raring to go, but there was a problem. The 80th annual Academy Awards show sucked. There's no other way to put it. I don't know what exactly it was, but the show was far from what it had been in prior years. Maybe it was the lack of quality movies (There Will Be Blood, Sweeney Todd...come on, seriously?) up for awards or maybe it was the lack of one movie running away with the show or maybe it was Jon Stewart's jokes missing their marks or maybe it was just me. Nothing that exciting happened. The songs performed were snoozers (three numbers from Enchanted...are you kidding me?) by people nobody has ever heard of. Hell, get Beyonce back that the Academy fell in love with two years ago when she performed about 23 times. And Stewart did an okay job, not great though. He had some good jokes and some witty input throughout the show, but for the most part his jokes were missing their marks. Of course he did a joke about democrats and one on how Bush is dumb...blah blah blah...we've heard these before Jon. Maybe it was the lack of time the writers had to deliver these jokes with the strike recently ending...who knows. Plus I think he held back on directing the humor toward individuals in the crowd. Stewart's better than that...he should of poked more fun at celebrities in the audience. Plus some of the videos they showed that were supposed to be funny ended up being just stupid (see the movie montage to binoculars).

The whole night wasn't all bad though. A refreshing moment was watching the down-to-earth Coen brothers speech after winning for adapted screenplay and picture of the year. Joel Coen, who hardly said anything the first time on stage, added after winning picture of the year, "I don't have much to add from before....thank you." Thank you Joel for being modest and keeping it short.

I was pulling for Juno or Michael Clayton for picture of the year and even though neither won, it was nice to see Juno and Diablo Cody (no way that's her real name) win for original screenplay. Very odd to see an ex-stripper on stage winning an Oscar as voted by The Academy...that's just something you don't see everyday.

Also, there was no Al Gore sightings! (Unless of course Al has taken the identity of someone else and in that case, we are all in serious trouble). It became the norm over the past few years for the liberal Academy to parade Gore on stage to talk about some iceberg that's melting somewhere and totally kill the mood of the evening as well. Kudos to the Academy for canning that annoying act.

That's all I have on this year's show. Overall I thought it was a yawn fest and hopefully it'll turn around next year. I have an idea for 2009...get Lewis Black or Ron White to host it...that'll mix things up a bit. If you disagree on this year's Oscars, let me hear about it below.

FOX Robot Needs To Go

Okay FOX, cut the crap. That annoying FOX robot needs to go. You know the one that shows up after commercial breaks during football games, jumps up and down, runs idly and does nothing that has to do with football. I know this is way overdue, but it needs to be said...or written.

I don't know when exactly the robot debuted for FOX. I know that it's been around a long time and grew out its welcome after about one Sunday. I've never understood why Fox felt the need to add this robot to its program or the reasoning behind it. I can't even imagine a conference room somewhere in Fox's studios where the idea was uttered up by some "marketing genius" and the people in the same room ate it up as an ideal plan.

Finally, someone decided it was time to kick the robot's ass. Enter...Terminator on Super Bowl Sunday. And the Terminator did not disappoint...



Justice! Now following the Terminator movie rules for time travel, I came up with an obvious answer. Someone in the future, who finally had enough of the FOX robot and knew he would cause the downfall of mankind if he continued, programmed the Terminator to travel back into the past and destroy the robot on national TV. I thought it was over.

I was wrong. Since nobody watches the Pro Bowl, you probably missed it. The robot made a glorious return in perfect condition. And...he was sporting a grass skirt and Hawaiian lei and was doing a hula dance. I wish I were joking.

What does any of this have to do with football?!?! And don't tell me it has anything to do with the advertisements. If I were those advertisers spending a fortune to have my logo on TV for five seconds and this freaking machine was jumping around like a damn pinball, I would be pissed. The robot idea was dumb from day one and it's dumb now. I can't think of a better word for it right now. It's just dumb. Get rid of it next year, FOX. I beg you...you can keep Joe Buck around, just can the robot now.

Pitchers and Catchers Reporting

"They give you a round bat and they throw you a round ball and they tell
you to hit it square." -- Willie Stargell

Lost in the shuffle of the Clemens, McNamee, Pettitte, HGH headlines today was pitchers and catchers reported to Florida and Arizona, signaling that the first signs of spring and baseball are just around the corner! Thank God. Despite being a Pirates fan, every year I'm pumped for the start of spring training. I guess when you think about it every team (yes even the Bucs) has a shot at beginning anew and claiming that World Series title in the fall. Of course, the Pirates will be out of by the end of April, but hey from a sunny perspective in Florida we sure can dream right?

So what's going on this first day of spring training? Here are some news clippings from around the Grapefruit and Cactus League.

The World Champs are back. The Red Sox pitchers and catchers reported today to Fort Myers and apparently they are thinking about repeating as champions. Shocking, I know. And they have a good shot of doing the job. They didn't lose much of any significant players from last year's team and with a pitching staff that will return Josh Beckett, Dice K, young prospects Jon Lester, Clay Buchholz and the ever-reliable 4.00 ERA/180 IP guy per year Tim Wakefield. Forget about Curt Schilling for now...his loss, for half a season or whatever it'll be, hurts but this team won't need him to cruise into the playoffs. I'm sure he'll suddenly be back and healthy come October.

The Dodgers checked into Dodgertown in Vero Beach, Fla., for the 61st year and also their last as the team plans to move onto Glendale, Arizona next year (of course it would be the fast rising city of Glendale). Sure the move to Arizona makes sense geographically, but moving out of Dodgertown where you have been for over 61 years is a bit weak. But I guess the Dodgers are used to pulling out of things to make more money somewhere else.

Reigning AL Cy Young winner C.C. Sabathia checked into the Tribe's camp in Winter Haven, Fla., and announced that he was done talking about a possible extension with the Indians until after the season. Sabathia could become a free agent after the 2008 season, and I'm sure he wants to test the free agent market and see the $$$ that awaits him. Supposedly Cleveland offered him a four-year deal where he would make at least $17 mil next year. That wasn't good enough and really, with the Yankees and Red Sox out there reading to spend money, it probably wasn't enough. Sabathia is rolling the dice, though, in a contract year and better produce if he wants a Johan Santana type deal.

A couple of former junk Pirates showed up on new rosters today as well. Former No. 1 draft pick Kris Benson signed with the Phillies. Wow, look who's desperate for pitching. After his publicized divorce from Anna Benson, Kris missed the entire 2007 season due to some injury (it doesn't matter, he's had all of them in his career) and I totally forgot he could still throw the baseball. Also, Craig Wilson (nicknamed "Thor" in Pittsburgh) signed with the Reds. If there's one place that will tolerate striking out a ton and blasting home runs once a week, it's Cincinnati so maybe he'll make the team and then bury the Pirates in their first series with four home runs in three games.

Speaking of former Pirates, it was reported that Dodgers pitcher Jason Schmidt will likely not be ready for Opening Day and there's no timetable for his return. Yeah, that three-year, $47 million contract he signed last offseason is looking solid for LA. What does Schmidt have to show for all that money so far? One win. He went 1-4 with a 6.31 ERA last season before needing surgery. Joe Torre has his work cut out for him in the city of Angels.

Oh yeah, can you feel baseball in the air?! The Wheelhouse can and I can't wait to get the season underway.

Who Wants To Commit Perjury?

When I was younger, like five or so, I used to believe that the sports leagues were government agencies. It made sense; their names were abbreviations, red, white and blue were in their color schemes, and often there were stars involved in the logos. When I found out that the NFL was run by a bunch of rich people instead of the government, I was completely crestfallen.

Now I'm wondering if I wasn't right all along.

Today the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee held a 4 ½ hour hearing to try and determine who is the bigger perjurer, Roger Clemens or Brian McNamee. What is this country coming to?

Seriously, both men walked into the Congress of the United States of America, swore to God Almighty to tell the truth, then told two completely contradictory stories while sitting at the same table.

Under oath:
Clemens: "I have never taken steroids or HGH..."
McMamee: "Make no mistake: When I told Sen. Mitchell that I injected Roger Clemens with performance-enhancing drugs, I told the truth."

Jesus Tap Dancing Christ. One of these bastards just committed perjury.

I don't know what I'm more offended over though, that one of these two guys have the balls to lie to Congress under oath, or that Congress is holding hearings to get answers about whether or not a baseball player got juiced like everybody else in MLB through what is now being called, “The Steroids Era.”

What business is this of Congress' anyway? Are we not at war? Seriously, because I thought we were at war. I could have sworn we were at war in Iraq and Afghanistan. I guess that's going well enough that we can focus on a game. A game!

Congress has created a media circus over these baseball hearings. From Mark McGwire refusing to answer questions, to Rafael Palmero wagging his finger, to today- blatant perjury by either one of the game's all time greats, or a confirmed scum bag- it has been a long road to nowhere.

Congress has about as much business in baseball as the Pittsburgh Pirates have in drafting appropriation bills. If you want to know the truth about all the shadiness that has taken place regarding steroids and baseball over the past thirty years, read the Mitchell Report, it's all there. There's no need to hold hearings, the only crime that has been committed is the waste of taxpayers' dollars.

Of course, this won't end here. Now that we know that either Clemens or McNamee has lied under oath, the media will set forth to prove one to be the liar that he is. This will obviously lead to federal charges of perjury, because lying to Congress under oath is a felony. Consider this, if somehow there were to be collected enough evidence to prove Roger Clemens lied today, he could land in federal “pound my ass” prison. All because he won't say what we all know, and because Congress wants to either make him admit it, or serve time.

The only court Clemens should be tried in is the court of public opinion, and the only business Congress should have in baseball is buying season tickets to Nationals games.

What a sad day for baseball, and what a sadder day for America.